Late

Here I am at 41 weeks pregnant. Ready, so ready, to have this man-child on the outside of me so that my bruised ribs can heal, I can eat sushi again, and most importantly, so I can finally show him off to the whole world! The past 7 days have felt like Groundhog Day (the movie, not the holiday), except I'm not nearly as entertaining as Bill Murray. My mom and youngest sister came to stay with us in anticipation of the birth and to support me in the days afterwards. So far we've done a lot of sleeping in, walking around, playing with our new kitten, and eating ice cream. I'm not complaining...it has been great to have a vacation from work and to spend so much time with my family, which is a rarity these days. As much as I love spending all this time with them, I know they will eventually have to leave and I want them to get as much time with their newest family member as they did with his momma. 

My Aaron has been working hard every day and still finds the energy to love me by "nesting" in ways that I'm severely incapable of doing in a rational way. Thanks to him, we have the nursery painted, crib assembled, ceiling fan installed, changing table set up, birth pool inflated in our bedroom, and all the laundry finally folded and put away. He is amazing. We went on an early anniversary dinner date tonight to celebrate a rare evening alone. It was so nice. I had butterflies on the way to the restaurant, mostly because I knew this would be our last uncomplicated dinner out for a while. The "no-turning-back" mentality had been creeping up on us here and there during the week but we both settled into the realization that parenthood is going to be different and awesome and completely worth it. I am so blessed to be in this together with him. Not just because he has 7 younger siblings and knows a few things about birth, babies, and changing diapers (score!). He's also become 10 times more of a man in just the first year of our marriage and I know that will rub off on our son. If he wasn't so wonderful during these last 9 months, I am pretty sure I would have been a whole lot less pleasant to be around as well.

I wish I knew someone who has done everything that I will ever do and can tell me just how things are going to feel in ways that people will never tell you. Does that even make sense? Like me from the future, I guess. No one told me about the butterflies I would feel as I take a shower, thinking it may be my last one where I can be efficient or just stand there enjoying the hot water if I so choose. Or that calm before the storm that settles deep in the heart of a woman who knows she's going to do something really, really challenging on every level of her being in the very near future. And I'm pretty sure no one would ever tell me that they would lay in bed at night enjoying how nice it was to have a pain-free crotch and to savor the moment. Well, I've felt all of those things just in the last week. I convinced myself that the reason I couldn't go into labor was because my to-do list wasn't finished. I simply could not have a baby before I had maternity photos taken, washed all my clothes, paid all the bills, and cleaned out the fridge (to name a few). Certainly, my son was just as concerned with these things as I was, right? 

I've had an abnormally pleasant pregnancy, with little to complain about (although everyone tells me I should complain about something, so sometimes I do, just to fit in). I almost wanted to have something uncomfortable happen over these 9 months so that I could justify wanting an easy labor. You know that, too good to be true feeling? But I'm not focusing on the storm around me. I'm going to look straight ahead, focus on the task at hand, and have an amazingly spiritual connection with my Maker as I bring my firstborn son into the world. 

Maternity pictures, taken by the amazing Lisa Barker!